Two couples from Wales face the destruction of their stored embryos after a sperm donor withdraws consent for further use, reigniting calls for Parliament to change UK fertility law. Both families spent tens of thousands of pounds on IVF and say they cannot afford to begin treatment again.
Nat and Nik Fraser-Edwards, from Penyffordd near Wrexham, paid £23,000 in total on fertility treatment before their son Jude was born in August last year. The couple had five embryos in storage and planned to use them so Nik could carry a sibling for Jude. A telephone consultation in June brought the news that their donor had withdrawn consent, and those embryos will now be destroyed.
‘It was very much, “unfortunately your donor has withdrawn his consent to use your embryos,”‘ said Nat, 37. ‘We were absolutely floored.’
Nik, 36, said the couple felt ‘blindsided’. ‘Yes, we’d signed something,’ she said. ‘But we didn’t ever recall it being verbally said.’ The pair say they cannot afford another round of treatment, meaning Nik may never experience pregnancy herself.
Second couple’s 10 embryos also face destruction
Sam Beesley and Carly Estlick, from Shrewsbury, are expecting a boy they plan to call Finn in October after going through IVF. Last month, they too learned that the same donor had withdrawn consent. Their 10 remaining embryos will be destroyed in 2027.
‘When we got the letter saying he had withdrawn consent, it felt like the wind was taken out of our sails,’ said Sam, 41. ‘Carly is already grieving. In her head, they’ve already been destroyed. Whereas until that day in 2027, I will not stop fighting.’
Sam said the news has added pressure to the current pregnancy. ‘Carly is very fearful that something will happen to Finn,’ she said. ‘This is probably our only shot at being parents. I don’t know how we could afford to go through it again financially, emotionally, physically.’
Nat said the family ‘lived on the breadline for quite a while, just to make this work’, having taken out loans to cover the bills. For both couples, the prospect of funding further treatment is not realistic.
Sperm donor withdraws consent: what the law says
Under current UK legislation, a sperm or egg donor may withdraw consent at any time up until an embryo is transferred into the womb. According to the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority (HFEA), once consent is withdrawn by any party (patient, partner or donor) clinics must observe a 12-month cooling-off period during which embryos can still be stored legally. After that period, the embryos must be allowed to perish. The Fraser-Edwards family’s embryos are within that window now.
The Reproductive BioMedicine Online journal has noted that, unlike other jurisdictions, UK law permits gamete donors to withdraw consent at any point before insemination or embryo transfer, a position that sets Britain apart from a number of comparable legal systems.
Separately, NHS Sperm Donation sets out that donor-conceived people can access identifying information about their donor (including name, date of birth and last known address) once they reach 18, an existing obligation on donors that sits alongside the consent rules now being contested.
Rachel Cutting, the HFEA’s director of compliance, said the regulator is sympathetic but cannot act unilaterally. ‘It’s about each person who provides an egg or sperm having that autonomy to consent and make that decision to whether they’re happy for a child to be born in treatment,’ she said. ‘We can look at it further, but it is for the law to be changed and that’s not something within the power that the HFEA has.’
Cutting said clinics must warn patients of the possibility of donors withdrawing consent ‘because it is really upsetting and distressing when this happens’.
The number of donors in the UK who withdraw consent is unknown, as the data is not collected. While it is rare, it is not unheard of.
Both couples now want the law changed so that once an embryo has been created, a donor’s consent cannot be withdrawn. A Department of Health and Social Care spokesperson said the government sympathises with ‘anyone facing difficult and distressing circumstances during fertility treatment’, adding: ‘We continue to work closely with the fertility sector to support high-quality, compassionate care, and we keep all aspects of the regulatory regime under review to the same end.’
Sam said she will not give up on the 10 embryos until the day they are destroyed. Carly’s due date for Finn in October is now the family’s immediate focus.
